With alcohol as something you depend on to help out, there’s always something that might set one off. Good day. Bad day. Thursday. The exact reason is kind of beside the point. Getting past the excuse is usually the most difficult aspect to negotiate, if there is to be negotiation.

It was that kind of a day… but got past the excuses.


Press play and read on.

My day yesterday was crap.

I mean, actually. First thing in the morning, baby has a poopy diaper. Of course, I don’t mind changing my little darling’s nappies throughout. Part of the job, innit?

But then it got to half four and there I was, hosing adult human faeces from the rear wheel of the pram. Not the little one’s, not mine, not no one’s I know, no.

[stunned shrug]

Like, actually, what is this shit? I suppose it’s true what they say, one man’s ginnel is another’s FUCKING TOILET. I know everywhere has some variant on Dog Poo Alley, or Little Shitaly as we term it… but people of Acomb, I expect more from you, I really do.

So, that was me. Ready. With a pressure hose, and a value pack of Huggies, yesterday. YesTURDay. Harrumph!

[FX: Flush]